You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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