Do vagina's smell?
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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