the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
