If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Randomize
