Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize
