You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
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I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
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Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
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