Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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