"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
