I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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