I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
I just gargled with NyQuil
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
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