Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
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