Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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