just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Randomize
