doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
