The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
