I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
