Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
my vag is so smooth its legendary
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
