Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize