You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
