Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize