I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
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