i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
The air taste purple.
Randomize
