? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
