so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
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