maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize