Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
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