apparently the secret to your success is patron
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
Damn victory sex feels great
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
