Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Randomize