weddingsv make me drug and hornr
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
In other news, I just burned my penis
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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