HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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