put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
We had sex on a dog bed..
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
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