weddingsv make me drug and hornr
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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