Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
