Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Randomize
