I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
