It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
