I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Randomize
