I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
