So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
The Olympian is in my bed
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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