When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
