I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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