I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
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