pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
