I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
You should frame my arrest warrant.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
