Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Randomize
