All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Randomize
