Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
