forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
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I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
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Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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