he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
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