Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Randomize
