after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Come see our sink grown plant.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
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