she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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